hey. Iknow ist's been like 1 month since I blogged. I"M ALIVE. okay, just in case you were wondering...actually life's been pretty restless for me, I'm sad to say...I have my darling KaiQi to accompany me in class(to Sleep) darling Kok,(doggy no.2) Lynette( whom I cannot call darling or lack will kill me...) but it's like life just goes on. Irealised that no matter how many friends you make in the year, when you like leave, you forget everything... no, maybe not, but, it's hard to strike up converations with people whom you haven't seen in a long while... which crazy guy said: absence makes the heart gorw fonder? cause it's so totally UNTRUE. Let me share a secret... wait, secrets aren't meant to be shared... haha... I feel friendless... you know, i always pray that God would grant me this special friend who is well like me, accepts me for who I am, and well, we can talk about the most sensitive stuffs... at the moment, I only have God... but I want a real person get it? hm....don't feel offended okay? I mean any one who reads this? Lynette comes close to the friend i want. so does kok. but, hm... there's just something missing.... I don't Know what.
hm... e maths test was screwed. I admit, I've not been exactly FAITHFUl in studying... but I tried. Praying that God would give me discipline and self-control...haiz. I wonder if i'm the person that God wants me to be. cause I kind of realise that I am IRRITATING myself. I wonder, if i put myself in other people's shoes, what would I think about myself? But, why must my self worth be based on what other people see me? Shouldn't I be thinking how worth I am to God, and ya... but, I wanna walk in other people's shoes...Perhaps I'm irritating cause I do stuff, or say things before I think, or filter my thoughts... I guess it's not frank, it's hurting. I really need tothink first and move this big brain of mine. So if I've offended anyone, SORRY....oh my,I just realised, I'm maturing... I guess this is the moulding process, whereby, God guides me in the right direction... If only I weren't that stubborn...